• Julia Wesley

A Love Letter to Spiritual Practitioners: Inspiration v. Over-Giving

There is this insidious idea in the spiritual community, and from people who benefit from the work of spiritual practitioners of all kinds, that their work should be free.

And look, even though I am a Capricorn, I’m not going to pretend like the idea of having to charge for my work wasn’t something I felt guilty about and had to work through.

And it’s important that we do because way back when, spiritual practitioners that served a group of people were taken care of by those same people. Practitioners didn’t need to charge, because the community they served saw to their needs.

These feelings of shame and guilt lead to over-giving. We fall into the trap of doing everything for free because we buy the false narrative that “true” spirituality is free and doesn’t demand reciprocation from people. Because if spiritual practitioners charge people for our time and energy, then it soils the “pure” work of Spirit.

A lot of us don’t even realize that we hold on to these beliefs, but if you are having a hard time charging your worth—or charging at all, you’ve probably got a couple of them knocking around in the back of your skull.

We tell ourselves that we feel bad asking for money—it puts so much pressure on the reader and the reading itself, and that it’s such a burden for the sitter. Who would pay that much money? We want to be able to serve everyone. Not everyone is made out of money!

And so we feel so much better giving away our services for free. Because it doesn’t demand that we assert what our work is worth. What we are worth. If you are an introvert, it’s similar to that rush of relief you feel when you cancel plans to go out.

(Whoosh, what a relief! Nobody owes anyone anything. The energy is open-hearted and purely giving! I can focus on giving a low-stakes reading that no one has any right to complain about because it's free! And maybe if I’m feeling bold, I’ll put a link up for donations—but probably not because I don’t want to come off as needy or like I’m just in it for the money.)

Well, this is the year 2020, and nobody puts a roof over my head but me. I love to serve the community, but in order to keep that roof over my head, I am going to have to charge for my labors of love.

And I’m fairly attached to indoor plumbing, so why should I have to live in a hollowed-out tree log in order to do the work I feel called to? The community members I serve don’t live in hollowed out tree logs, so why should they ask that of me?

They shouldn’t. Moving on.

Let’s get down to the energy of giving. Why, especially in a spiritual business setting, is it so addictive to just give our services away? Why do we do so many free Facebook and Instagram lives? Why do we choke at the opportunity to ask people to pay for what we give them so freely?

And you hear this a lot, don’t you? Giving is receiving! It’s the same energy! You have to give to receive! (But like, when does the receiving happen? Did I miss it?)

Honestly, I get it. When I give someone a free reading, I feel excited, because I have removed the pressure from myself. And even more honestly, it’s less excitement than it is relief.

It’s that kind of relief you get as a kid when you leave the doctor's office. Like, shit was about to get real, but I escaped certain death and now I can get back to playing.

It’s the kind of relief that keeps you small and “safe” because it doesn’t expect too much of you. So you feel like you can do whatever you want in your playpen, but venturing out beyond those limitations makes you curl up into a ball, energetically.

As spiritual practitioners, we are always chasing that energy of freedom in our services and offerings. We tend to think that money places expectations and limitations on that freedom.

But actually, the problem isn’t the money. It’s that we are acting without inspiration.

Inspired action feels like the same energy as unconditionally giving something away.

Inspiration is the safe expansiveness that we are looking for. Also, feeling inspired by our own work makes us feel like we aren’t just trying to pull one over on our clients.

When we are taking inspired action, we believe in our offering so much that we *know* people will benefit from it. Or that they will “get their money’s worth” from it.

That full-hearted belief in ourselves, what spirit has brought forth through us, and our excitement to share it with those who need it, allow us to “give” in our marketing.

All of a sudden the energy around telling people about a paid service feels like you are doing them a huge favor. Sort of like telling the new guy in town all the great places to eat that you wouldn’t give up to a tourist. Here, let me do you a favor. This is where the best Thai food is! You’ll thank me for it. . .

Now, instead of feeling like you are begging, you are doing people a great service just by telling them about this amazing new offer you have. And it feels 100% authentic and aligned, because you fully believe in what you are selling.

And it barely even feels like selling. It just feels like giving, because you are giving away all your enthusiasm, excitement, assuredness, and confidence will the knowledge that it will all come back to you.

This is why giving isn’t always reciprocated as receiving. It seems weird, but it’s because we are giving from a place of lack. We are giving because we feel like we have nothing of value and have to convince people to like us, want us, see worthiness in us.

It’s the same reason why we might try to convince the popular kids at school to like us. We don’t see our own value, and we would like them to validate it for us—even if we have to work way too hard for it.

But I’m here to tell you that your work is valuable, needed and that you are so so good at it. But even better? I don’t want you to want my validation. I want you to be thrilled with your own. For you to know it down to the marrow of your bones that you are doing what you came here to do, and that no one can do exactly what you can.

When you get in touch with your Soul’s Blueprint, you can feel that validation. It’s the inner knowing that what you are doing is the exact right thing for you. And if you are missing that validation, or if you are still struggling with over-giving, I feel so, so great about recommending a Soul Blueprint Alignment session with me.

Why? Because it will get you back in touch with that inner authority that you are looking for, and need in order to start really making strides with your spiritual business.

Because once you stop looking for the authority to do what you love from your clients and peers, you can start focusing more on actually doing the work you love with the freedom that comes from knowing you are doing exactly what you’re here to do. BOOK NOW.

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©2019 by Julia Wesley. Proudly created with Portrait photography by Georgiana.

Disclaimer: By booking a reading you agree to the following terms and conditions: The readings that I provide are for guidance only. What you decide to do with the information that I give you, including any actions you take, is down to your own personal responsibility and choice. All readings and questions answered should at no time be regarded as legal, medical, financial, psychological or business fact and are subject to your own interpretation and judgment. For legal reasons we have to advise you that the readings are for entertainment purposes only. My services are not a substitute for professional services and it is advised that you should seek advice from the relevant qualified expert.