How often do you hear this in New Age communities?
“You have to kill your ego!”
“I’m going through an ego death.”
Personally, I heard people talk about taking hits out on their ego a lot. It almost made me feel like I was doing something wrong if I wasn’t trying to bludgeon my individuality into bits. And it also felt totally impossible.
That’s because it is pretty impossible. Honestly, it’s as achievable as “killing” your eyeballs, or “destroying” your breath. It just doesn’t work that way. And it’s somewhat alarming. We're over here trying to murder this aspect of ourselves, so it’s no wonder the ego bucks and panics when we talk like that! We fall over ourselves to demonize the ego and burn it at the stake, and all it has ever done for us is try to keep us safe.
Let’s take a deep breath and think about this.
Everything is energy, right? Therefore, the ego is just an expression of energy, and as such, cannot actually “die” or be “destroyed”. To bring science into it (sorry science people), as the First Law of Thermodynamics says, energy cannot be created or destroyed, it can only be transformed.
So what is the point of “killing” the ego? To be blunt, there really isn’t one. First, you can’t kill the ego. Let’s get that out of the way so we can stop feeling like bad spiritual people. Your ego is an expression of you. You can no more kill the ego than you can kill any other part of yourself.
Secondly, the ego is just a function of perspective. If levels of consciousness were a telescope or a binocular, the ego perspective would be the most up-close, zoomed-in, setting; and the higher-self perspective would be the most wide-lensed, zoomed-out, perspective. (This is somewhat of a limited metaphor but it will do for now.)
In truth, the ego is just a tool of the godself. Therefore, the ego is actually part of your godself. (Remember when we agreed everything was energy? And as literally everything is energy, all things are expressions of that energy--which I call god.) To think that you are the ego is where the problems start. This is because, as stated previously, the ego has a smaller and more limited perspective.
The ego is a tool that is meant to be used for detail (the detail being the experience of “you”). If the higher-self has the “expanded” perspective, the ego has a more detailed oriented perspective. The ego is more focused. It is intentionally zoomed-in to pay more attention to specific details. Details like living your own life as your unique self.
Let me say this once more: The ego is just a tool. It is meant to be used. It is meant to be worked with.
The ego is an expression of creativity. It is a tool of self-expression. It’s meant to be fun! The ego is just one of many ways to experience unity and infinity through a unique perspective and is meant to be playful and experiential.
God says to itself, what is it like to experience wholeness and infinity through a limited identity? And in the excitement to experience it, we create the ego! The false store-front to life! As such, there is no inherent harm in the ego. The harm comes from forgetting the ego is just part of you--not the whole of you.
In fact, I would posit that the enlightened individuals who have shown up on earth never were “ego-less”. The Buddha is different from Jesus is different from Krishna is different from Mother Mary and so on. They were unique, displayed personality, and were distinct. The only difference between them and us is they had more fully integrated their higher-self view into their perspective. Their ego became more expansive, and therefore more godlike. As such, the enlightened perspective isn’t outside your reach. It stands to reason, if you have an ego, you’re halfway there.
In future conversations around our ego, let’s shift the narrative to focus more on healing the ego rather than killing it. Let's try transforming the ego, rather than demonizing it. Because in identifying as the ego, we have fallen down a rabbit hole that would freak Alice. By forgetting the more expanded perspective, the ego has worked overtime to create meaning, order, structure, and reason. All with varying degrees of limited success. But that is all the ego is capable of: the limited “me”, detail-focused perspective. It is the higher-self perspective that allows for things like putting yourself in someone else’s shoes or empathy, and “psychic” phenomena. (Which only seems supernatural because it is outside the purview of the ego.)
So stop hating on your ego. It doesn’t need to be killed, murdered, or destroyed. Your ego just needs to be brought back into wholeness.
If you are interested in learning how your ego functions to serve the collective and yourself, my Soul Blueprint Alignment sessions are an energetic tune-up designed to help you remember what you came here to do, and how you came here to do it. This is particularly useful if you are a spiritual practitioner looking to expand your practice and connect to your sense of purpose, and feel a deeper connection between yourself and your guides.